Buyer Beware

Craig should have come with a disclaimer: if you marry this man, you will be miserable.

Don't get me wrong. Almost every minute I'm WITH Craig is bliss. I'm so hot for him even now after 5 years and three kids, it drives me bonkers. Here's the dilema. I'm never with him. Ever. He works 45-55 minutes away, so that means he's gone at least 10 hours a day, he's had extremely busy church callings for the past three years, and his latest, YM president means he's away on all sorts of campouts and youth conferences, mutuals, presidency meetings, etc. When he's not doing that, there are 3 little munchins that need daddy attention. So we're apart alot. Too much. I'm not the kind of wife that needs much "girl time." It's not my thing. At all. I need Craig time, alot of it, all the time and I never get enough.

So why is it that when you are dating everything is perfect and you can totally be together almost non-stop, and then the second you slip that ring on your finger, you're never together? WHY WHY WHY? I'm sure it has something to do with responsibility and being an adult, and actually going to work, and bla bla bla bla bla, but dang it all, it stinks. I actually find myself feeling a little bit jealous of the guys Craig works with, or the young men, or anyone else who gets to see my husband more than I do (And sleeping doesn't count, buy the way) isn't that pathetic?

It really is all my fault. I walked right into it. I married a man I was totally, insanely, ridiculously in love with. But now I'm cursed, because weekends like this, are agony for me. I've had fun, sure. It's been a blast to hang with the fam, and they've totally saved me from a weekend of misery, thanks Tash. But everything's a little grayer when Craig's not around. I swear the sun doesn't shine as bright. I guess life really is a trade-off, I may have married the perfect man, but I'll spend the rest of my life love-sick and miserable.